Thursday, August 17, 2006
Dated : 17082006(Day Three.)
A beautiful Day.
Meteor Night
Drawing No 01
Before you start laughing, let me explain.
These 3 pictures was what i spent quite sometime drawin on my PC before we got together.
Today, i put it out not becos of anything but, as a memorable memories of what i did.
As far as i know, chris ang will not draw something so ugly, can..haha.
But, sincerely..
For a silly lass like her, this are a few simple drawings that i wish to cheer her up that time.
When i seriously ask myself now, why has this moments of drawings stopped, i couldn't answer now.
Maybe it's my work, maybe i'm full stress of what is currently happening.
But, if i have the spare time, i will still do it, ugly or not.
Time : 0224pm.
30 mins ago i did someting that i really shouldn't do. Went to her email & saw 1 of the email a butch named jo, jo tan sent her. She had mentioned to me abt her talking to her & abt their before happening & talks. Mel fell in love with her while she did not in their teens.
After many years later, which is now, she likes her back.
And it happens during our struggling to be together.
Mel had explained that she and her remains as friends.
But, this morning she said, "she don't know".
I remember with my high fever yesterday still after i reached home at 7plus. I quickly had a shower then pops all the pills i had & took a quick rest.
At about 0830pm, i jump up in a shock, thought that i over-slept that i missed her overseas call.
Luckily i did not.
She did call about 9plus and we chatted. She accompanied me throughout my hot porridge before taking medication. I felt a kinda blissed.
Maybe in past i didn't take it really seriously, i really feel so blissful and peaceful. Of course i didn't tell her about it, cos i figured that she din wanna hear all these.. Well, i know can already. =_)
I sent her a message saying that i saw the butch's email & apologise also for intruding inside for the 1st time.
Well, she may always have all rights to change her passwords & banned me from msn but.. know something guys?
I had all passwords our date of getting together, my banks pw, my PC, my handphone, my everything.
I don't have the intention to change it anyway.
Now, can anyone pls correct me?
Which girlfriend don't check on their girlfriends at all?
If there's any, please wack me at my head hard and let me join my grandmother now.
And yes, you may have already given me up & so i shouldn't do that.
For so many days & nights, i have been seeking for a valid reasons why i should be giving up or WHY you are giving me up.
I have so many reasons in my head right now but, i can't accept it becos i'm not you.
Although that email do not mean anything.
But, it at least give me a reason for not always blaming you for neglecting me.
Hate me all you wants right now, i won't stop you and i deserved it.
And please, don't read this entry if you are gonna cry.
This is a place for a broken-hearted fool who wants to write all feelings & waiting time for a girl who thinks she's not worthy.
It's a place for this fool to vent all angers, sadness & grieving.
I didn't want things to turn out this way.
Driving my car recently, i always contained lotsa stress, sometimes tearful eyes on the way.
I even have the habit to speed up, like flying sometimes, so free.
The best part i like was to look up the sky often & see if there's any planes.
You know wat i mean, probably anticipation again.
By the way, 2 more days to her birthday.
Actually, i got the card a few days back under my bed..
When i open it up, i was hesitating to write. Why? I have so much to say, to write.
Got a letter-book and planning to write letters for her but,..
I plan to send it out, maybe a bit later..
She's still in class, probably thinking how to sever all ties with me in future.
At the end of your day, sit back and think it all over..
You can have back everything rightfully yours, i won't intrude anymore.
You can have my blessings.
You can dislike me becos i'm jerk to look into ur mails.
But, as long as this blog keeps going on.
I'm always here.
chr|s on 2:12 PM
